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Friday, April 22, 2005

Not the whole story...

Network Administrator Friend sent me an email in response to yesterday's post about her amazingly independent kids, which allow her some freedom and make her life as an at-home parent less stressful.

She said I really saw a skewed view of her kids during our stay with her family, mostly because Younger Brother was never with us without Older Brother or Toddler in Chief. She said that when Older Brother is in pre-school, Younger Brother doesn't know what to do with himself because he is so used to having someone to play with. So when he should be off making his own fun, he can't handle the alone time and gets a bit overwhelming.

So here's her attempt to set the record straight:
You didn't get to see this, since either (Older Brother) or (TIC) was around at all times, so (Younger Brother) wasn't that bad during your trip. On normal days, when (Older Brother) is in school, (Younger Brother) will not leave me alone. He follows me from room to room, just chants "Mama Mama Mama" and interrupts everything I try to do. So, I find that I use the time I have alone with him to grocery shop, run errands, etc, just so were not just hanging around the house, because then he wants to be entertained.

And he always wants to wrestle, which is annoying to me, but (Older Brother) loves it. (Younger Brother) also will get into "destructo" mode when I don't pay attention to him (when Older Brother is at school), and if I try to read email, the paper, make a phone call, etc, he goes off and finds something really naughty and makes a huge mess. Just for the attention. Even at 18 months, bad attention is better than none, I guess. :-)

We've been trying "time out" for Younger Brother when he bites, throws or hits, but it doesn't seem to be working. I set up the Pack n Play in living room, in a corner, with no toys, no view of the TV, nothing to do. Anyway, he was in it yesterday (he dumped out all the cat food and water while I was trying to do the laundry - Older Brother was at school), but he entertained himself enough that he didn't mind it. I think it works better when Older Brother is home, since then he is reminded that he can't have the toy Older Brother is playing with, but by himself, he just jumped around and laughed. Oh well.
Still, if the only times that are rough for Network Admin Friend are when Older Brother is at daycare, it still sounds like she has a pretty good situation.

Although from the comments from Kristen, Geeky Mom, and Bethany seem to suggest that it gets easier the older they get, regardless of how clingy or needy they are now.

2 comments:

  1. I'll add my voice to the "it does get better" crowd. Our son was pretty clingy, especially to his mom, but as he met more kids in preschool and as he got older he became more independent.

    Just keep repeating, "it's just temporary, it's just a phase" and before you know it one day you'll actually miss those times when TinCh wanted to be with you...

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  2. I know Network Admin had a *good* day when you were there... we all have 'em . :-) But be assured, my baby at almost 2 1/2 is starting to open up to time by himself and to other people. He was the epitomy of a mamma's boy. After a sickly weekend, I can say the Mama boy isn't out of him yet! :-) Not that I am *ready* for THAT yet...

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