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Thursday, August 21, 2014

My first friend

(Yes, this is a Google Maps screenshot)
In 1980, when my family moved to a different house on the same street, it may as well have been to a different state. You see, Walnut Street divided those two blocks of Pound Street like an impassable highway to my six-year-old self. In that simple move just a block away, I lost touch with my first best friend. Walnut Street was the boundary that separated one school from another. The north side went to Washington Hunt Elementary and the south side went to Roy B. Kelley Elementary. I ended up at the latter school after the move.

I’ve always felt bad about that lost connection. At six, I was allowed to cross the street, and so I could have done a better job trekking that extra block back to Juniper Street where she lived—I just didn’t. All these years, I've wanted to apologize to her about that.

I have the best memories of from when we played together. I remember eating snap peas off the plants in her yard in the summertime, having white rice with butter at her family's dinner table (something that never appeared on my family’s table), and getting pulled home by her dad on a sled in what felt like the middle of the night on our first sleepover attempt when I ended up being too nervous to stay the whole night. She remembers other things—running away from home to my house and the time when I fell on my way home from school and a stranger gave me candy. I didn’t eat it, but instead gave it to my mother. Apparently my brother ended up eating it anyway. I wonder what he and my mother remember about that day?

I connected with her a few days ago via Facebook, and connecting with her (and finally apologizing for losing touch) is one of the things that makes Facebook actually worthwhile. But ultimately, all of these stirred up memories from decades long ago make me wonder what things have already been solidified in my children's memories, things that they will carry with them for the next 35-plus years.

4 comments:

  1. Suzanne, you made me cry! I fondly remember those days! I remember calling your Mom to let her know our daughter was running away to your house and both of us laughing. She graciously offered to let her stay the night and since she came home the next day all was well in our little world! Thank you for the beautiful trip down memory lane!

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    1. Thank you for sharing your part of the story! Heather and I took our turns crying last week when we first started messaging each other. Wonderful times. I can't wait to meet up with her next time I'm in WNY.

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  2. I have that same thought--especially now that Gwendolyn is ten. Some of the most essential things about me were already true when I was ten. So I marvel at her, wondering what the things are that will never change. Its a cool feeling. Miss you XOXOX C

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    1. It's hard to believe, but so true that our essence is formed so early in life. I'm amazed that I had such powerful feelings about loss and pain and the desire to mend things at such a young age. And I can't help but try to translate that into my children's lives and wonder what important life lessons they've already squirreled away.

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