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Monday, October 06, 2008

The opposite of mysterious

I'm not as mysterious as I think I am.

Another rewarding Thursday night out with friends was coming to an end as I started chatting with one of the regular bartenders. Only instead of mixing drinks that night, he was on the other side of the bar enjoying a drink of his own. We've exchanged pleasantries over the past couple of months and he remembered my name that night. "Hello Suzanne. Did you have a good time tonight?" I said yes. He asked if I also go out on Fridays and Saturdays. I said no. "So you are married, then?" It was more a statement than a question. Without hesitation, his follow-up question: "And how many kids do you have?" I said two. Then he asked if I had to work in the morning. I said yes, as soon as my kids get up. "So you're a housewife." I cringed at the use of that word.

I'd like to think I'm so much more. But I'm not. I like to come up with fancy ways to explain what it is that I do: chief operating office of my household; executive chef; activities and social coordinator; art director; personal shopper. Oh yes, and aspiring author.

But really, I'm a housewife. I told him that he really isn't allowed to say that. No one wants to be called a housewife. He just smiled his Irish smile and said that his mom is a housewife too. Then, just as the lights were coming on and the bar was emptying out, he invited me to an after party at his house. I declined and slinked away with my housewifery label burned across my forehead. I couldn't believe he had me all figured out in five seconds flat.

I'm not as mysterious as I think I am.


  1. well... i think it'd be neat if one of my roles was housewife. at least for awhile. :-)

    my mom was one. her mom was one.

    someday, maybe. at least for a little while.

  2. What's funny (but not ha-ha funny) is that I didn't want the label four years ago, when my kids were still at home and I could justify my housewifery existence.

    Now what can I say? I really am at home with just the house to look after.

    Embrace the lack of mystery, is I guess what I'm trying to say. What you're doing now is wonderful, and it will be over far too soon.

  3. I am a housewife as well, although I do not claim that title.
    I recieved an email once that had the same sense behind the "Stay At Home Mom" title. In the email it stated that she was tired of the looks and feelings she received from others when she told them she was a "Stay at Home Mom". So she decided to come up with a name to define what she does for a living. She now tells everyone that asks what she does for a living that she is a "Field Researcher in Childhood Development". Which made her feel so much more gratification of herself and got more respect from people.

    Keep smiling and I appreciate working alongside of you in the FIELD. RESEARCHING all we can in our CHILDren, and helping them DEVELOP into the most wonderful people.