There are no more cookies. I just double-checked and it's true. I ate all of them two days ago. I thought the best way to get rid of those last four jumbo cookies was to just eat them all at once. Then they would be gone. It worked. There were gone. And I felt sick. And then later that day when I went to get more cookies, I was angry that I had eaten them all at once and not saved any for later.
Since there are no cookies, I scoured around looking for something to eat that would serve as a decent substitute for chocolate cookies. What I found was a jumbo container of Ovaltine. That's chocolaty. And it's practically good for me. It's fortified, you know. Then I found a mostly-empty, 64-ounce Costco-sized tub of plain, whole fat yogurt. And I mixed a generous helping of Ovaltine into the yogurt. It was almost like soft chocolate ice cream. Almost.
What is wrong with me? I can not buy anymore cookies or ice cream or chocolate or candy (or Ovaltine, apparently) until this whole emotional-eating thing passes and I can walk through the kitchen with my hands at my side and my mouth closed. I look forward to the day when I can throw food in the garbage, when leftovers from my kids' plates do not equal an extra helping for me. I look forward to the day when I don't squeeze my muffin-top after every meal.